Monday, 1 February 2016

Suffering Sourpuss – Shiten Show Spectacular Sickens Scouse Stand Supplier

It appears that I may have scattered the sawdust with a certain individual in the Shiten Roll of Shame in my Noelanders report.  For some reason just because you played “chicken” with an electric saw, and lost, doesn’t AUTOMATICALLY enrol you in the Shiten Hall of Fame although some would say that it worked for Simon Jones!  Membership is a precious and valueless gift that is bestowed only to biggest and up and coming shites in UK Bonsai and occasionally the mentally unhinged!
Life's tough in that there Wirral like!
Harcourt “Dougie” Mudd seems aggrieved that his plywood stand wasn’t included in the list of shite personnel but what do you expect if you’re not a member?  It has been discussed, at length, that we could do with a casket maker for all the trees that Les kills* and your name was near the top of the list and duly under consideration. 

Unfortunately, with your blatant attempt at “queue jumping” and your impossibly high stands of your work, this just MIGHT work against your inclusion into this Club of very high moral standards and outstanding fashion sense. 
For those of you younger viewers who don’t know “Fingers” Mudd, he is highly sought after in the UK and abroad in true Scouse style but not by the rozzers or Interpol as you would first expect.  His fine work has help lift good trees into great trees, or so he tells me, and he must feel that being a Disciple of Shitenisum would further help his road to enlightenment.  We do agree that his subline use of MDF, rough sawn Pine and Hardboard is a cut above the rest but does he REALLY have what it takes to be an all-round total Shite?  Below is some of his work, we will let you be judge, jury and executioner!

Whilst we are “setting the record straight” I would like to reply to a comment made in a report by Peter Snart Jnr from Kent.  He reported that Shiten was started as “a joke” by the Grown-Up Baby and Frog Boy and this may well be true.  Although seen in many circles, and by many esteemed Bonsaists, as a joke, Les and I, along with the ever increasing list of disciples, BELIEVE in the true spirit of little trees and are helping to raise, or in some cases prop up, that bar in the belief that no matter how large your chequebook or how little talent you have we can ALL make our trees Shite and should be proud!  It does, however, begin to appear that the joke is now on us with Shiten getting legitimate invitations to exhibit our trees.  Maybe, at the start, this was not our mantra and maybe it still isn’t, but who knows that maybe one day we will able to visually abuse the viewing public at an event like the Swindon Winter Image Show or EVEN the prestigious MBS Show!

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